Wednesday, January 30, 2008

baby mustache

Amidst all the clamor to name cute young animals, I've neglected a task of my own: naming my new mustache. It's about ten days old, but it's already exhibiting really plucky behavior.  It often wakes me in the night with unspeakable demands, which we then laugh about in the morning as I strain coffee through it.  It can't get enough coffee!  Anyway, it's starting to get embarrassing; my parents are asking pointed questions, there are forms to fill out, online profiles to complete...  Little help?

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

How about "Brent"?

Anonymous said...

What about "Nostrox"?

From Wikipedia:
cyclops (pronounced /ˈsaɪklɒps/), or kyklops (Greek Κύκλωψ), is a member of a primordial race of giants, each with a single round eye in the middle of its forehead. The cyclops is said to have offered his eye to Cronus in exchange for the ability to see into the future. But Cronus tricked the cyclops so that all he can see is the day of his own death.

The nostrox is, like the cyclops, a member of the primordial race of giants. The nostrox has only one round nostral in the center of his nose. He is said to have offered his nostral to Cronus in exchange for knowledge of the past. Cronus tricked him and gave him only knowledge of his own birthday.

Anonymous said...

Frida.


-V

Matthew Echert said...

Well, step 1 is obviously to narrow it down by choosing a more specific pronoun. No more of this "it" business. He or she? I'd actually like to suggest "they". Then you could say things like "They often wake me in the night with unspeakable demands". Then when people look at you funny you can reply "they're telling me we don't like you." You could give them some kind of sci-fi-ish name, like The (something) Collective. e.g., to build on David's suggestion, The Nostrox Collective.

(I'm told the best way to ward off actual crazy people is to appear crazy yourself. Then again, what was it Hawthorne wrote about how you can only pretend to be something for so long before you become that thing? hmm.)

Anonymous said...

Stan Lee would be honored if you named them 'Man-Thing' - after his often looked over Marvel swamp creature character (the one "not Spider-Man"). He can't sling a web, but he sure knew how to grow hair on his lip. Also if something awful happened to your mustache, (just like Man-Thing who is not a solid creature), they can regenerate themselves and become stronger! Faster! Evan-er!

Anonymous said...

Soupy.

Kirk said...

"The Believer"