But my creation of this monstrosity was partially inspired by this piece by our Mr. Osebold:
MYTH OF THE MACHINE KING
[Ten thousand screens turn on. An electrical buzzing blare. The buzz creates MAN.]
MAN: Egad. I'm naked.
[MAN goes shopping for clothes. He runs into OILTANKER MANAGEMENT, ten
men talking as one.]
OILTANKER MANAGEMENT: We were created from the dust of decrepit metal and the ashes of burning bodies.
[From the footsteps of MAN springs POOR PEOPLE. From the earwax of MAN springs VIOLET THE SECRETARY. From the excrement of MAN springs MAN'S BROTHER. OILTANKER MANAGEMENT and VIOLET THE SECRETARY have a son named ACHILLES. MAN'S BROTHER eats POOR PEOPLE, but MAN just makes more poor people and brothers. ACHILLES and VIOLET THE SECRETARY have quadruplets named THE FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE APOCOLYPSE. VIOLET THE SECRETARY throws up.]
MAN: I need a bigger house.
[From the sacrifices of unwilling POOR PEOPLE and a few brothers, OILTANKER MANAGEMENT constructs a building for MAN. It pokes through the clouds and punctures the sky. BUILDING and SKY have a son named DEITY WITH HUMAN BITS AND A GOAT HEAD. VIOLET THE SECRETARY asks for a raise and is sacrificed to the COFFEE MAKER on the 23rd floor of BUILDING. Happy hour starts. The band plays. No one is watching the horizon.]
ICE AGE: Heh heh.
So, um, there you go.